On Sunday, Insecure took its viewers deeper into the complicated lives of Molly and Andrew. Since Molly finally decided to open up and share her true feelings for Andrew, we now get to see how they are navigating this new relationship.
But Molly's conversation with Andrew (and Issa) taught us a few things about communication in a new relationship.
Don't leave anything up to interpretation
Work work work work work work! That's the name of Molly's game.
In this week's episode, Molly finally put down her legal pad to give her man undivided attention, but he was not on the same page. Andrew made plans to hang with his boys. He assumed Molly would be working into the wee hours of the morning.
How did he come to this decision? He's seen it before.
They make plans.
Molly says she has to finish work.
Hours pass by, and now the evening has come and gone.
No time spent together.
Andrew thought he was helping out by giving Molly time and space to work. And Molly thought he was ditching her to hang out with the guys. Two completely different pages.
Have you ever been overlooked for a project at work? Has someone spoken on your behalf to either volunteer your time/services or to say you wouldn't be interested in something?
This happens because you are leaving too much gray space in your communication. You are not communicating with your teammates or boss about your current projects or what you are interested in doing next. They are using your previous behaviors as a guidebook when deciding where and when to use your talents.
Don't let them! Change the narrative when you feel like your opportunities at work are beginning to decline or slip.
Speak up more. Over-communicate what you're working on, what you enjoy doing, and how excited you are about upcoming projects.
If you sit back and wait for tasks to find you, you are going to end up at a crossroads.
Communicate your main priorities
After you find yourself trying to understand how and when your message got lost in translation, take immediate action to get back on track.
After that awkward dinner, Molly visits Andrew and says, "I didn't mean to make you feel like an afterthought." She continues to tell him that he is her main priority.
When was the last time you told your boss or partners at work that THIS, your job, was your main priority? When was the last time you made your employer FEEL like they are number one?
Just because you show up to work everyday, participate in meetings, and send/respond to emails doesn't automatically validate your commitment to the organization.
Molly decided to stop assuming that Andrew automatically understood that he was number one. She openly communicated it to him. Clear and concise.
And that is precisely how you should show up to work, especially if you are at an impasse.
Know when to ask for favors
The drama between Issa and Molly is heating up. And it's only a matter of time before their relationship takes a turn for the worst. But there is something valuable about their interaction in episode four.
When Issa called Molly to "talk," Molly needed her friend at that moment. And Issa did too, but they were on two different pages with their needs.
Friends help friends, right? Of course! But do friends help friends when they don't feel the love and support in their relationship? Hmmm. That's something to think about.
Have you ever asked for a favor at work? Did you ask for that favor when you were on good or bad terms? More than likely, you asked for support when things were moving in a positive direction, not negative or at a standstill.
How can you ask for support when you are unable to recognize what went wrong in the project?
Molly's follow up questions to Issa's ask were valid:
Why did your headliner drop out?
Did you have a contract?
Were you late on any of the payments?
Did you do anything on your side that could have voided the contract?
Issa wasn't trying to hear it. "Look girl, I just need to fix this," was her response.
If you are going to use our lifeline and ask for support from a colleague, you better make sure you are ready to answer any questions they have. If Issa had taken the time to answer Molly's discovery questions, the result would have been different.
Instead, Molly decided not to help her bestie to protect her relationship with Andrew.
Translation: Issa, I am not going to help you because you have no idea where you went wrong, and you are not about to drag my man and his work up into the drama you created.
And we ain't mad at you, girl.